Meeting Half Way
In January, I decided very intentionally to start spending more time with friends. I have a toddler and like most parents I suppose, I love seeing them with a playmate. One of the best things about being a parent has been seeing things through her eyes, watching the cars pass, discovering new colors she can say but mostly just paying attention to her joy. I moved to NC over 10 years ago and many of my friends are a little further than I’d like.
Chasing your life and love and career is all good until you just want to have a casual lunch with a friend and can’t. Recently, I was like fuck this shit. My closest and longest friend lives 3 hours away. I asked her if we could start meeting halfway for long lunches and hangs.
Hell yeah she said, and we couldn’t believe that we hadn’t discussed it sooner. In all honesty, we had definitely discussed it many times but without any commitment or intention to actually do it. That all changed this year, her birthday is in January and mine is in November. We started with her birthday and will end with mine. Now since we are meeting in the middle we had no idea where we would go or do but a quick tik tok search will give you some good places and once the algorithm picks it up you’ll very quickly be getting recommendations to the best places. Our first hang was so fun, we literally walked and talked, it didn’t matter much what we did but we were disappointed that the things we hoped to do in Winston Salem was closed so we just enjoyed the scenery and caught up. The goal now was to meet quarterly putting our next playdate in May.
6 Months Later…
Our second hang finally happened but was pushed back because it’s hard for schedules to align of course. But on this hang we met for Brunch, casually walked past an indie theater and stumbled upon a secret garden. Well, it wasn’t so secret I’m sure but it was a secret to us. It was actually where we were in January but just the other side. Hints here on perspective and revisiting places and time and themes.
The simplicity of walking with a friend. We were hot and sweaty and giddy, just happy to accidentally find the perfect picnic place and Fall hang. The place we found was luxurious and had a literal castle like hotel close by. Turns out Oprah and Maya Angelou would often host events and vacation here, (I imagine Gayle, as well). Since we found it, we know we will be back, and have a place to go.
Wherever your friends, are I am just pushing you to reimagine what visiting can look like. It was hot AF, also but now I am more than prepared to keep up this hang time.
This is my very first post so I’m not sure if it’s too much or too little, I am just happy to write but if you made it here, thanks for reading.
I am going to try and write here every Monday or as often as I can. My name is Adrienne Michelle, LMFT. I am a black lesbian, therapist, and writer (in that order). Thanks for joining me for my random thoughts, outside of the office
…and because you’re going to want to read what’s next.
…and in case you need to soothe your nervous system, check out my meditations on YouTube.